closer to 30 and assessing life

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Last week I had my 27th birthday, and let me confess, I had a meltdown. I know I am probably too young to start hating birthdays and I am constantly reminded of that quote "do not regret growing old, it is a privledged denied to most." Yet, I still manage to get worked up about the things I haven't accomplished and what I am lacking in my life.

To quote another blogger "27 is much different from 26, at 26 I was just a year older than 25, at 27 I am getting closer to 30." Thank you for summing that up perfectly. 27 is just a few short years away from 30, and aren't you supposed to be grown up by then?

I don't know why I felt so crappy on my birthday, I have a lot to show for my 27 years, but somehow I still wanted to be further along. I set out to search what you "should" have accomplished by 30 to see if I was at least on the right track.....

6 hours later....

So........ I searched out other peoples accomplishment lists and their opinions of the things you need to accomplish before 30, like the places to visit, and the foods to eat, but then I found myself thinking, why am I holding myself to other people’s standards? I never have before, I didn’t follow someone else's road map thus far in my life, so I’m not going to start now. I think some of the stuff I read was of value, like “learn to balance your check book” well I can confidently check that off the list. But other ones like, Buy a entire bar full of people a drink and have a one night stand, well, those don’t really rank very high on my to – do lists in life. Instead, I have complied a list of what I feel are my greatest accomplishments and the things I hope to check off my bucket list by the time I’m 30.

What I’ve accomplished in 27 years....

  1. I moved out of my home town (seriously, that’s kind of a big accomplishment where I’m from).
  2. I moved across the country to Chicago. The Midwest is very different in terms of values, ideals and especially weather. It opened my eyes beyond the farming community I was raised in.
  3. I graduated college, 3 majors, 3 schools, and huge amounts of student loan debt later, I did it. My degree is from an Art school, but it is in something I absolutely love. I probably could have gotten to the same point I am at now without it, but I don’t know If I would have the same confidence.
  4. I moved to Los Angeles, a city I have grown to love. I cannot imagine living anywhere else, nor do I plan to. LA is my home and I am very thankful we can afford to live here (very modestly of course).
  5. I married my best friend. For city folks we probably married young (I was 25, he 27) but we had been together 5 years and from the beginning we talked about marriage. He is my biggest fan and I could not find someone who loves me more.
  6. I started my blog (December 2010). I honestly had no intentions when it began. I just needed to speak my mind and share my closet. Since then I have realized I can turn it into a business and I aim to do so.
  7. I got my first and only tattoo! It was on the bucket list an it hurt like hell!! I got it on the outer side of my right foot and it says “Peace Patience Positively” Three things I have to constantly remind myself to enact.
  8. I jumped out of a plane. Another thing on my bucket list, but something I did not enjoy one bit!! I’ve heard people say it’s better than sex… they must be having bad sex! I hated every second of it, so needless to say, that won’t be happening ever again. I will not be bungee jumping either!
  9. I have taught myself a variety of skills: computer software, blogging, web design (very minimally), how to write television sitcoms (not well) refinishing furniture, sewing, tennis.... etc. But what I’ve realized is with enough googling and reading I can teach myself anything, thus I will constantly be learning new things.
  10. Successfully and with minimal damage figured out exactly who I am. I didn’t have to experiment with drugs, sex or alcohol to find who the real Tori is. I will say it took me till I was 25 to do so. I am constantly redefining who I am and how I see the world, but I know unequivocally who I am and what I stand for. I am very confidant in that fact.


Things I hope to accomplish by June 2015

  1. Make this blog into a revenue generating business. I want to be a full time lifestyle blogger who make appearances, gives interviews & advice, maybe get a book deal… who knows. I want to be the new age Martha Stewart without a stylist!
  2. I want to be able to afford a place with a yard and at least 2 bedrooms. This may sound crazy simple, but in LA, what I have outlined is expensive.
  3. I want to have visited at least one country in Europe. It’s a big place so I need to start soon!
  4. I want to see the northern lights, be it Canada, Alaska or Montana, I wanna go!
  5. I want to take a cruise. Don’t care where or how long, but it needs to happen. It would be nice to take my mom and my siblings with me too.
  6. I want to have read at least 20 new books (I should probably start keeping track).
  7. I want to finish my TV pilot script and start on a couple of my other ideas as well.
  8. I want to decorate the entirety of my home and love every corner of it. I want to feel settled in one place.
  9. I want to be having serious baby talks, if we don’t have a baby yet.
  10. I want to welcome my thirties with no regrets and buckets of confidence & determination.


So there you have it, a small slice of me and who I am. I know this is a very different type of post than I usually do, but I felt like it was worth sharing. Have any of you gone through a mid-twenties life crisis? I feel like I have a lot to be proud of but I'm still unsettled with what I want to accomplish. I'll let you know when I find contentment ;) 


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5 comments :

Anonymous said...

This is awesome! I'll be 30 in a few months, and I haven't really thought about what I haven't done or what I have done. I think my outlook on life has changed a little though since my dad and sister died. My priority is being a good wife and taking care of my son and making his life important and meaningful. It's probably bad to not really think of my future goals anymore, but I'm happy doing what I'm doing, so I'll continue on that for a while. :)

As far as the cruise, I know Alaska has really nice cruises for not too expensive, and...you can see the northern lights! Two checks!! :) It's funny. Looking at you at 27, I remember being that age and feeling so young. I think becoming a mother will age you quite a bit (maturity wise). Not that I was immature at 27, but your mind shifts I think.

Great post Tori. I feel I know you a little better! :) <3

toni

Katie- Hems for Her said...

I love this post! (And I was excited to see what your tattoo said- I've always wondered!). I struggled with 27 and 28 for the exact same reasons, but seriously reading through your list- it's just amazing!!! You have done so much. And I promise, 30 is a piece of cake!

Anonymous said...

Can I just say one thing, as for being grown up at 30, I am 39 and still waiting on that happening. When I was younger I used to ask my mum what age I would be when I was grown up, she said "when you have a child" I had my daughter at 16. Not grown up. I asked again "when you are 18". Nope. At 39 my mum unfortunately has gone and I cannot continue to ask her when I will be grown up, but have come to the conclusion that I don't want to be grown up. I like being me. As long as I am doing a good job in looking after my family and looking after myself, having fun and just living why would I want to be grown up?

Catie @ Catie's Corner said...

Great post, Tori! With my 35th birthday creeping up in November, it's funny to hear you being concerned about what you or haven't achieved by now. I have no problem with getting older, I'm still me not matter what number I'm at. That's all it is, a number!! I feel more comfortable in my skin than I did years ago. I look better now than when I was a teenager or even in my twenties. Don't stress over reaching a goal by a certain age. Things will come in time. They always seem to work out on their own. As for feeling like a grown up, I don't know when that happens. I'm a mom, but I still feel like I'm 16 sometimes. =)

~ Catie

Wendy Rippee said...

I love this. You have done a lot for 27 & you're going to do great things. You're so inspiring!
I'll be 28 this year, I need to make lists like these!